- [me talking on the phone in Spanish]
- White woman standing near me: God, don't people speak English in this country anymore?
- Me: Yes, and fuck off.
like 90% of the ocean remains unexplored and you’re telling me mermaids don’t exist smh
sometimes i wish i was xtina because whenever i got in an awkward situation i would just belt out a high note and leave
babies are so scary oh my god
there are like a billion ways to hurt or kill a baby and you have to make sure not to do any of those things. you have to consciously not do a billion things every second you are around a baby.
if i ever get arrested my only wish is that i look 10/10 bangable in my mugshot
i want to kiss joe so much but hes 31 so ill have to wait until im 18 because it might be a lil weird
do you ever random type
no that doesn’t look right
and so you erase it and try again
ah yes that’s how im feeling now
- me: oh gosh that character is attractive
- person: but he's the villain
- me: i'm sorry were you trying to make a point there because i don't see one